Awhile back, a few of my friends and I were confessing some of our issues over email.
- I can’t lose weight, it is totally impossible.
- I am not going to make enough money this month. I won’t be able to clothe and feed my children.
- People think I am a bad mom. I think I am a bad mom. Am I a bad mom?
- I like my children better when they are sleeping.
- We have to tighten our budget and I don’t want to survive without Starbucks! Can I disguise Starbucks in an Aldi-brand coffee container?
- I am afraid that everyone is going to think that I am not good at my job. As a payback one of my co-workers is going come and try to kill me like from that Bruce Willis movie where he is dead the whole time and then we find out his client killed him. I really hate that movie.
- OMG the self-hatred…I am not even going to repeat those thoughts.
- My daughter’s brain is going to get eaten up from all of the tv I let her watch.
Let’s come back to those in a minute….
If you missed them, here are parts 1- 6 on Psalm 131 and Contentment, from a talk I gave at MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) a few years ago.
Just yesterday I was with a group of women and I asked for prayer because I’ve been feeling a lot of anxiety about my kids. It hits me at night when I am, of course, desperately trying to fall asleep.
(Remember sleep? Oh it used to be so refreshing…those were the days.)
Anyway, It was a small moment, but it was healing for me to hear the other ladies say, “Oh tooootally! I do that too!” The conversation normalized my anxiety and gave me some insight into why I might be feeling that way.
Now, I realize that some of us have difficulty finding authentic relationships. We have tried all of these things and they haven’t worked. I KNOW that being in community is not easy or natural for everyone. There are introverts out there. There are women that suffer from social anxiety and/or shame. There are women that have put themselves out there and have truly been hurt.
If that’s you, please know that I am praying for you. You are loved beyond measure by a God who knows how you feel, can handle your burdens, and wants all of you.
Back to the email conversation…another one of my friend’s–the wise one in the group–replied to all:
â€œIt seems like your feelings are telling you to rest.â€
Interdependence is fundamental to being a satisfied and content woman. Other women can give you a much-needed break, hold you accountable, and remind you that you are not alone.
So, I’d love to know…how do you practice interdependence? How do you and your friend’s encourage each other? If you have struggled with this, what is your story? How do you think women can love each other better?